Bullying:
It is a form of violence, which is any aggressive behavior caused by a person or a group of people on purpose, repeated several times, that may result in harm or distress to the target person (whether a child or young) including physical, psychological or social harm or educational, common types of bullying include:
- Physical (such as hitting, kicking, and stealing).
- Verbal (ex: insults and harassment).
- Social relationship (such as: spreading rumors, or excluding him from a group to harm him).
- Cyberbullying (e.g.: mocking or intimidating someone through text messages, social networking, or hacking into an individual's account).
- Damage to the property of the bullied person.
Bullying can also happen through technology, which is called cyberbullying in the form of verbal threats or behavior conducted through electronic technology such as cell phones, email, social media, or text messaging.
Reasons for bullying:
No one is born a bully. However, anyone can develop and acquire bullying behaviors under certain circumstances. Some of the reasons include:
- Most children who bully have been bullied before.
- Joining a group of bullies to seek popularity or acceptance, or to avoid being bullied.
- Developing and acquiring aggressive and bullying behavior at home, at school, or through the media.
- Feeling ignored at home or suffering from a negative relationship with parents.
- Feeling weak and helpless, through excessive parental protection, which makes them look for other ways to gain strength and exercise control over others.
- Jealousy and attention seeking.
- Emotional and psychological insecurity.
- Lack of awareness of the true harmful impact of bullying on victims.
Signs that may indicate being bullied:
- Physical injuries (e.g.: bruises or scratches).
- Poor sleeping pattern or starting to urinate in bed.
- A change in eating habits.
- Loss or damage of the child's belongings.
- Unwillingness or fear of going to school.
- Low academic achievement.
- Desire to sit alone and not participate in activities.
- Anxiety, mood swings, feeling unhappy or angry.
The impact of bullying:
- Low self-confidence and helplessness.
- Lack of focus and poor academic performance.
- Problems in adjusting to school and thus prone to absence from school and school dropout (student dropping out of school and not completing this stage).
- Mental health problems (such as: depression, anxiety, and suicide attempts).
- Exposure to greater risk of drug abuse.
Reasons why bystanders do not intervene in bullying:
- Believing that someone else will interfere.
- Fear of being hurt, bullied, or becoming unloved or hated.
- They may be friends with the bully/abuser (even if they don't agree with how he is behaving).
- A bystander is not a friend of the person being bullied.
What can be done when being bullied or witnessing a bullying situation:
- Looking confidently into the eyes of the bully and repeating any of these phrases in a clear voice: “Please don't talk to me like that” or “I don't like what you're doing.”
- Walk with your head held high. Using this type of body language sends a message to the bully that you are not vulnerable.
- Tell a trusted adult (e.g. parents, teachers or coaches).
- Report bullying if it threatens to cause physical danger or harm.
- Avoid hitting or physically attacking. You are more likely to get hurt and get in trouble trying to fight off a bully.
- Try to talk to the bully and point out how dangerous and harmful their behavior is.
- Practice self-confidence by practicing ways to respond to the bully verbally or through behavior.
- Talk to a guidance counselor, teacher, friend or anyone who can provide the support you need.
- Advocate for friends and others who are being bullied; To help the victim feel supported and the bullying may stop.
Tips for a bully:
- Remember that although people are different, it is important to treat everyone with respect.
- Find a way to use power positively rather than belittling others.
- Try to talk to a trusted adult about why you became a bully.
- Think about how the person being bullied feels.
Tips for parents:
- If a child is being bullied, he needs guidance, love and support.
- If a child is being bullied, it is necessary to listen and talk to him.
- Give the child full attention while speaking in a quiet place.
- Children often don't tell about bullying because they fear it will make the bullying worse, so it's important to let him know that you believe him and that he did the right thing by telling you.
- Ask him simple questions (such as: So, what happened next and what did you do next) and then listen to the answers.
- To remain calm; To show him how to solve problems, when feeling angry or anxious, you must wait until you feel calm before talking to him or others.
- Make sure the child knows it's not his fault (e.g.: it didn't happen because he wears glasses).
- Praise and encourage the child to continue to share problems with you (e.g.: I'm so glad you told me this).
- Avoid negative comments (e.g. you have to stand up for yourself or you can stay home).
- Not encouraging him to resist, and suggesting that he stay away from the bully to avoid him and not give him importance.
- Explaining to the child why some children bully; To help them realize that the situation is not their fault (e.g. the bully might copy others and not know bullying is wrong or they have a problem and think making others feel bad will make things better).
- If your child is being bullied at school, get help from the teacher and school as soon as possible.
- The child needs to know that you are working on the problem, so be sure to tell him that you will talk to the teacher or school about it. It is important not to blame the bully or speak negatively, and to focus on the positives a child can do.
- not trying to punish the bully; Because this usually does not help stop bullying.
Tips for knowing your child is a bully:
If a child is bullying someone else, do not ignore them and act as soon as possible. In the long run, bullies continue to have problems, which may get worse if allowed. These bullies often become less successful in their work and family lives, and their aggressive behavior may develop and confront Problems with the law for that:
- Talk to him about his behavior and teach him what bullying means and why it is a problem.
- Clarify the strengths of his personality and his positive qualities.
- Try to help him see things from the other child's point of view (the victim or the bully).
- Show real examples of the bad results of his actions.
- Put strict limits on his aggressive or harmful behavior when it is repeated.
- Develop new and constructive ways to get what he wants and ways to treat others with respect.
- Use effective non-physical discipline (e.g.: loss of privileges) when a child needs discipline.
- Find positive ways to stop bullying with the principal, teachers, counselors, and parents of children being bullied.
- Supervise their time online and monitor the sites they browse.
- Seek help from a specialist (e.g.: teacher, psychological counselor) when facing difficulty in changing behavior.
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